self-condemned christianity

from this morning’s devotions, this really stood out:

‘English priest C.F. Andrews, who was called Deenabandhu [Friend of the Poor] by the Indians among whom he served, said this: “Christ seeks from us deeds not words. Devotion to Him is in the first place not sentimental but practical. If the Christian faith has no power to restore or recreate the human will, leading one to deeds of unselfish service, then it stands self-condemned.”‘

[Common Prayer: A liturgy for ordinary radicals]

blessed are the poor [just as long as we can keep them out of sight, out of mind]

last night the beautiful Val and Monkman and myself went to a homeless memorial service in town where a bunch of different organisations who work with homeless people, such as project home where will [who runs our alternative seminary classes] works to specifically remember those homeless or previously homeless people who had died in the last year – more than fifty names were read out at one part of the service which took place outside in the gentle rain…

at one point in the service a friend of the simple way played Bruce Springsteen’s ‘Streets of Philadelphia’, one of my favourite and most moving of songs, which has never felt so apt [actually being on the streets of philadelphia] and the words are as follows:

“I was bruised and battered and I couldnt tell
What I felt
I was unrecognizable to myself
I saw my reflection in a window I didn’t know
My own face
Oh brother are you gonna leave me
Wastin´away
On the streets of philadelphia

I walked the avenue till my legs felt like stone
I heard the voices of friends vanished and gone
At night I could hear the blood in my veins
Black and whispering as the rain
On the streets of philadelphia

Aint no angel gonna greet me
Its just you and I my friend
My clothes don’t fit me no more
I walked a thousand miles
Just to slip the skin

The night has fallen, Im lyin awake
I can feel myself fading away
So receive me brother with your faithless kiss
Or will we leave each other alone like this
On the streets of philadelphia.”

[Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/b/bruce+springsteen/streets+of+philadelphia_20025067.html%5D

Jesus said, “There will always be poor people among you” and I think we often receive that in a resigned way – oh well, Jesus said there’s always going to be poor people so why even bother trying to make a difference. But i think He was speaking prophetically, not so much about what has to be the case [we do have enough resources for everyone at this present time] but from a place of knowing the heart of man – because you are greedy and put yourself first and choose your comfort over someone elses need, as a result of that, there will always be poor people among you.

this blog has the word ‘poor’ in the title so it is not going to get as many hits as say my relationship blogs [how can I do MY relationships better?] and the people who made it down this far are most likely not the ones who need to read or be reminded of any of this stuff, except maybe a little, and maybe it’s that little which counts. i know i need to hear it [and i have chosen to live in a poor neighborhood and work with poor people] because there is still a lot that needs to change in my own life.

but standing in the rain last nite with a whole lot of homeless people from all diverse backgrounds [poverty is not racist] and walks of life, and the people who work with them, i was moved once again that we can NOT SETTLE FOR THE WAY THINGS ARE – where those who have keep piling up more and more while those who don’t are left to suffer alone… especially as the church… part of our mandate is to look after the least of these.

“The night has fallen, Im lyin awake
I can feel myself fading away
So receive me brother with your faithless kiss
Or will we leave each other alone like this
On the streets of philadelphia.”

i am homeless, not heart-less

two nights ago val got a call from a guy from a local church who told her that some homeless people [who had been evicted along with the ‘Occupy Philly’ people this week] had moved under a nearby bridge and would we the Simple Way be wanting to do anything about it – i chatted to him and got the details and told him i would try go that evening…

something more prioritised came up that evening and i wasn’t able to go, but first thing the next morning Val and i drove to go and find them and i went in to go and assess the situation and see what was happening…

and i met Paul.

Paul chatted to me for maybe half an hour to an hour [while my beautiful wife Val waited patiently in the car, not wanting to interrupt the man moment – she was originally going to go shop while i chatted but decided to wait which was cool] and it was just the raddest time. starting off by saying they didn’t really need anything [a mind blow for me with homeless people with my general experience back home] but that they had most of their needs met [there were about twenty tents under the bridge and they had access to running water in a nearby laundromat that didn’t lock up and people keep on coming by and supplying food and more] but at the end i was able to offer some bedrolls and jackets which the Simple Way has had donated and i took them through last nite.

Paul handed me this letter which he had written and was hoping to have posted in a local newspaper [i found it online fortunately so didn’t have to write it again so it definitely got posted somewhere] and gave me permission to share it with you and i think it is just excellent and felt so privileged to have spent time with him and Joe who i met last nite and Val and i are hopefully going back tomorrow to join them for a Quaker type service:

“We are not here protesting or to make a statement, We’re homeless. We are sick of being forced to exist alone, sick of being told that shelters, which are not tolerable living facilities for sober people, are an adequate alternative to being “allowed”, by the government, to work, live and share together to create for ourselves, with much less help and expense than the government can do anything, opportunities to provide for ourselves that which our troubled economy cannot.

Philadelphia has about 4,000 homeless people and 40,000 empty dwelling units, but, apparently, unless the wealthy can profit by our occupying these dwellings, they would rather see us alone, with our possessions if not stolen by regular criminals, ‘confiscated’ by police, since we have no place to store anything we can’t carry and are not allowed to congregate to watch one another’s belongings.

To have poverty forced upon us in the land of plenty, is no longer a viable solution, if in fact, it ever was.

I know how to grow food, build structures, build communities from the fragmented elements that current policy, make craftwork to supply cash for what it’s needed for, etc. My friends know how to do the things I don’t. Those who ‘have’ seem satisfied to make sure I don’t ‘have’ opportunity to gather to have a safe place to sleep, let alone organize to provide for our basic needs.

We need the use of at least one abandoned structure, if the law requires it to have water and electricity, the Obama administration provided $21 million dollars to help the homeless, this is a drop in the bucket.

We need an outdoor long term camping area, close enough to mass transit for us to meet medical, legal, pension and benefits and other needs, and large and separated enough to not disturb our neighbors and start to grow our own food and do art and craftwork, feed one another and see to one another’s daily needs.

In this sort of camp, people who get along can meet one another and we can help one another and be helped by those in the community who believe in, rather than merely preach, compassion, to get long term housing, use our varied skills to rehabilitate abandoned structures as we rehabilitate ourselves and work toward the caring, loving society that many believe we will make happen.

There are many caring people in Philadelphia, whose deeds as well as their words, demonstrate the belief that the present “crisis” is in fact and opportunity to create a land of “Liberty and Justice for All” rather than a land of “Just Us”.”

the tension that exists between fireworks and food parcels

tonite tbV and i headed out with our bossman darin and his cool kid justice and went to watch the fireworks in philly preceded by such a-liner bands as earth, wind and fire, dj jazzy jeff without the Fresh Prince, roots, estelle, some mcdonald guy formerly of the doobie brothers and boyz to men as a surprise act not on the programme – we arrived late for the bands but in time for the fireworks so pretty decent timing.

and i have to say without doubt that it was the best firework show i can remember seeing ever – some pretty big amazing fireworks but then some pretty bigger flippin amazinger fireworks – after seeing two big shows already from the rooftops plus other random peoples fireworks going off nightly for the last week or two in the build-up to july 4 i have to say i was largely over fireworks [a firework is a firework, right?] but there were a good couple that did some cool things from waterfalling type drip motion to strands that exploded different colours on the ends to the big poof cushion from the centre vibe… huge and impressive and mouth-opening.

as they were happening [they went on for a long time, felt like a half hour but was probly ten minutes of constant explosions] i thort back to this afternoon when we put together 16 bags of really quality food that had been donated by a store here and did the weekly food parcel handout. in the three weeks of doing this, it was by far the best food we have handed out with fruit packages, exotic salad collections, a bunch of fresh fruit and vegetables – 2 whole coconuts – and the cookies we prepared earlier [defrosted, bagged and bow-tied] – and it went to some really poor people from the local neighborhood.

my mind struggles to hold those two things together – having some small idea of how a smallish big fireworks show costs i cannot come close to imagining the kind of money that was poured into tonite’s show – i would go beyond thousands of dollars to hundreds of thousands of dollars and hope that not even entertaining millions is the right call [with the bands and elaborate sound system and big screens who knows what the whole thing went to]

for me there was a moment when the fireworks had awed me as much as fireworks are able to and it could have ended there and i would have been beyond happy. but it continued. for a long time. and a lot of the fireworks after that looked a lot similiar to the fireworks before that. i imagined if the last five minutes or whatever it was of fireworks [unnecessary in the big firework-watching context of the evening] had not been bought then what good that money could have done.

then i took a look at little justice sitting on his dad’s shoulders having an absolute blast [this kid gets excited by stuff] and i thort there is definitely some great element of worth there – i looked at the crowd of between 100 and 200 thousand people absolutely celebrating together in a scene somewhat reminiscent of us winning the rugby world cup or getting the soccer world cup bid and i thort there is good here. but i still am not sure if i can justify the extent of what was spent when i think of the poverty we have living all around us day to day.

i did have this thort at some point of my thortingness though, somewhere on the way home – i believe that everyone has to be doing something for the poor. not that everyone has to be doing everything for the poor or that everyone has to be doing something for all of the poor. but that every individual needs to be investing and engaging and reaching out to someone or ones who do not have as much as them…

probly more to follow, but this thort buzzes around my head as i head off to pushup and then to bed – oh and one more thort was to people back home who daily walk past people saying “i don’t have money to give you” and then enjoy golden circle tickets to U2 and Coldplay concerts… not sure i am able to get round that one, but then grapple with the difference between my movie ticket or improv evening or night out with my wife to someone else’s golden ticket, why is mine okay and theirs not?

i don’t particularly want to hear answers, just to know that you too are wrestling with some of this stuff, if you are.

i need an eye op. urgently.

i probly have a good 30 or 40 more blogs i could write about the goose fest but i don’t know if i’m going to get to them – i don’t want the blog to become a sort of dairy [as i spell it] of events and lose the heart of what is happening here – i also don’t want to be caught up too much in blogging that like a person filming or photographing an event i spend so much time filming the event i wasn’t really part of… i still don’t know if the simple way folks may some day see this blog as part of my ‘online ministry’ and ask me to take a sabbattical from it too for 6 months… so i feel i should write this one at least before it happens…

after listening to shane again at the goose [by far my favourite talk or session and largely because it was the first time in three days i remembered hearing the name Jesus more than once and heard passages read from the bible] i was reminded or challenged by the fact that i need an eye operation. i need to start seeing people the way Jesus sees them – he retold this one story about this argument he had with a buddy of his who told him ‘Jesus never spoke to a prostitute’ – shane whips out his bible and is ready to argue and quote scripture and claim battle victory but his friend continued, “the reason Jesus never spoke to a prostitute is that He never saw a prostitute, He only saw a child’ and that hit me once again and i know it needs to do so much more than give me a moment of “oh yes, that” – it needs to become my dna.

i know with some of the kids on the street and some of the parents whose names i am already learning it already has, because they are not statistics or a demographic – they are now a name and a person and a personality and a story – i have not come close to connecting with people on our street like i want to but i have started connecting and at least that is something, but with them i already have a growing sense of how God sees them.

but i know with a lot of the people i don’t have those eyes and i certainly don’t have the heart of Jesus that is desperately needed in the community – those dealing with or doing drugs and those who look worn down with the ugliness of life and some of the barely dressed women we pass in the streets and so on – i judge and i think i am so better and my sin and uncleaness is forgotten in a horrible instant of somehow thinking i may have earned everything God has so freely given to me.

i need God to give me new eyes. and i need a new heart. to see as He sees. to love as He loves.

i have realised since being here how little i actually care about the poor in for-real terms – and that’s another blog – but if i really cared for the poor as much as i needed to then my life back home would have looked dramatically different from what it does now – i can’t change the past but i know i need to be changed so that i walk a different future. that excites me. i know it starts with personal connection with God as well and that needs my attention too.